It's a lot of pressure. "Write, Monkey! WRITE!"
This is one of those.
Because there is not enough to do in the holiday season, my older kids' school decided they needed to put on their version of "America's Got Talent". Friday night, Tigger got up and sang her heart out for the judges and her whole school.
And she was good. Amazingly good. So good that Dylan thought she was lip syncing to Christina Aguilera.
But, unfortunately for my blog, she did not fall off the stage or catch fire, and aside from a minor technical glitch with the microphone, everything went well.
Until it came to the judges.
And unfortunately, that one beyotch judge also did not catch fire.
It's surprisingly hard to start a fire with only stage lights and a camera lens.
And yes, I know the judges were just kids too. But she was a beyotch. Don't judge me. You weren't there.
It was at that point that I realized I could totally become that psychotic cheerleader mom who put out a hit on another teenager.
Not that the judge should take this as a threat. 'Cause it isn't.
But she might want to watch her back. Just sayin'.
Update: As
So you're a cheerleader huh? ;) The camera lens line made me laugh!
ReplyDeleteA few months ago, there was an employee at Sam's Club who spoke sharply to my son (who is a sensitive, highly-well-behaved NICE KID), and I'm still thinking about driving my car into her.
ReplyDeleteno threats here, not really. (we could SO totally take her out...)
ReplyDeleteSuch a cute banner;)
ReplyDeleteI reckon Vodka Mom could help you with some tips...oh yeah, there she is, already beat me to it. I'm with her: we could SO take her out...
ReplyDeleteAnd then I read Jocelyn's comment and burst out laughing. I love your people, Kylie...love 'em.
ReplyDeleteHaha! Next time you'll have to bring a sippy cup filled with gasoline. (But you didn't hear it from me.)
ReplyDeleteLMAO...it is always good till some idiot judge gets involved.
ReplyDeleteSo let me get this straight...you would have been blogging your fingers off if some disaster had struck? Your whole family should be watching their backs! What might you do for a good post?!?!? :)
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ReplyDeleteI absolutely resent the insinuation that we (interested readers) are demanding and bossy. You just don't get it...you can't get us 'hooked' on the story and then not expect us to beg for more when we need a 'fix'. I AM ADDICTED!! I admit it...I need help!! I am addicted to (slightly)crack(ed). I need more....more, I tell you...more…
ReplyDeleteYou are probably also upset that we are getting ‘samples’ from your partner in crime…you don’t provide the goods someone else will…
My word verifivation is cophingu...is it a premonition that I am goign to get sick (coughing-U) or telling me cops are taking what I have written literally and are about to ambush my house?
I thought that she took the hit out on the cheerleader's mom. I'm from TX, too.
ReplyDeleteMeh. I hate smartarses.
ReplyDeleteUnless they are me.
And then I am all 'I am so awesome'
I second the hit on Melissa.
i came to visit and i am falling off my chair! how do you do it? i love your sense of humor!
ReplyDeletehappy holidays from the fluxlife blog!
-steve @ fluxlife
Bad judging at least calls for a good kneecapping.
ReplyDelete