Monday, August 11, 2008

An Anonymous, Hilarious, and Probably Overrated Story

Once upon a time there was a family that went on a trip. There was a mother and a grandpa and 3 little boys and a teenage girl. They journeyed to the center of the Earth through the Wieliczka salt mines.

These mines are filled with beautiful sculptures made from salt.

This is the underground chapel where the miners held mass.

This is also where something bad befell the family. Grandpa disappeared.

The mom and oldest child scoured the chapel, trying desperately to find the grandpa to no avail.

The family minus one continued to travel forward through the mine. They continued to look ahead as far as possible to find the grandpa.

The lovely Polish tour guide did her head count and realized one was missing. The mother told the tour guide that the missing person was with them and they had been unable to find him. This disclosure was followed by the heavy Polish sigh, with the implied accusation that the mother was stupid - obviously she is because she has four children, she's apparently never heard of birth control* - and lost control of one of her charges.

At the end of the corridor, the mother sent the oldest child to look ahead in the line for the elevator, but still they could not find grandpa.

They rode up in the old rickety mine elevator (which is an amusement park ride in itself), in the complete darkness aside from the one lonely flashlight hanging inside and then walked the half mile up the hill to the beginning.

Where they found grandpa waiting for them. Having a beer in the outdoor cafe.**

*Yes, I have issues.

**I have never once lost one of my four children. Not once. I am apparently capable only of losing 60 year old men. Who are over 6ft tall. And wearing bright purple shirts.

Disclaimer: While this may sound like a true story, it is not. Grandma should not be upset because the grandpa in this story is not the real grandpa. He's not. Really. Even though it sounds exactly like him. And we did actually go to the salt mines. And he really did get lost. Wait, no, um...that last part DID NOT happen. Seriously.


  1. I am laughing out loud, i think i might have peed in my pants.

  2. Oh Kylie you are too funny! Of course it's not true who would ever suspect a man to be sitting with a beer waiting on this family to return from their little tour!

  3. Grandma laughed and laughed and is still laughing.

    I have been told , more than once that I am a Saint.

    Love, Grandma

  4. Love it, love it, love it!!!! How funny that you could keep up with four kids but loose Grandpa.

  5. Ok, so I'm *infected* for a few weeks and you get your kid drunk and Grandpa lost (and maybe drunk too)? I need to reconsider who I hang with...;)


Comments are much appreciated! I love to hear the nice and clever things you have to say.

Anonymous comments will be deleted. Think of this as 1st grade and always put your name on your work:).