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So after my last post, y'all (ha, my Texas roots!) showed a lot of interest in how Poles dress.
And I was all set to start making fun of Poles (which always sounds totally wrong, but the Polish words are Polak for men, which is kind of derogatory in English, and Polka for women - which is a kind of dance/music from...Czech - seriously).
Then I came down with a really bad stomach virus. The second one I have had in two months.
Then today, I learned that a very dear (Polka) friend of mine has cancer. She runs her own business and has asked me to fill in for her while she has surgery and recuperates. So today did not seem like the best day to make fun of Poles.
But worry not dear friends, in the next couple of days I will revert to making fun of Poles.
For today though, I wanted to ask your advice. My friend wishes to pay me for my time. I would gladly do it for free (I have a very soft spot for cancer victims), but I know it would make her feel better to pay me. Should I let her pay me?
If so, how much? A token gesture?
We’re not going anywhere.
21 hours ago
How about bartering - when she is all weel she can do a favor for you?
ReplyDeleteI'd split the difference. She wants to pay you, so maybe do half the going rate?
ReplyDeleteIt's the cancer part that would stop me in my tracks, too :) If you feel bad about taking money, then it's never gonna work for you. Find something else you want, and let her pay for it: a salon visit, a book voucher, a DVD or CD you wanted, something like that. Exchange, like Citizen said...it works, you both contribute, and you're both satisfied.
ReplyDeleteIf it will help make her feel better, then definitely let her pay you. It doesn't have to be as much as she'd pay for a temp to fill in. You could always use the money treat both of you to a spa day or meal when she is well enough as a celebration.
ReplyDeleteOoh difficult! Bartering is good or you could just ask her to cover your costs - ie. do you have to pay for daycare while you are working.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to hear she is unwell, keeping my fingers crossed for her.
I look forward to some pole mockery soon.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about your friend. I think if she wants to pay you as a way to exercise some control over her business, life etc., I think it would be ok. I like the bartering idea too. But, if you are ok helping her for free, then you should let her know that. She should just focus on getting well.
ReplyDeleteyou have scruples, do you? i had a scruple once. it went through the dryer and shrank.
ReplyDeletesuggest cookies? cookies helps everything. my shrunken scruple would take cookies as payment.
oh! i'm doing a giveaway on my blog. check me out.
You need to let her pay you. Then she doesn't feel guilty asking you to help out.
ReplyDeleteMy sons hairdresser is a mum from school, Boo does not like anyone touching his hair but her. But she fights every time I try and pay her so I feel guilty asking and therefore Boo's hair goes uncut for longer than I would like.
Does that make sense?
I think you need to let her pay you something -- she needs to keep her dignity. But keep it a low amount.
ReplyDeleteI love VioletSky's idea. Let her treat you to a spa day or something that you guys can enjoy together (make sure she knows you don't need her to pay extra for the clothesless massage (see I do read all your posts)).
ReplyDeleteChiming in late here...I am so very sorry to hear about your friend's illness. It is wonderful that you want to do something for her. Being 'on the mend' myself (from VERY minor, totally non-life-threatening surgery) I can tell you that I hate feeling dependent on anyone. I would pay J if he would let me, and he has already had to stop me from trying to clean house and do laundry :-) So maybe that's where your friend's offer of payment is coming from.
ReplyDeleteLooks like you have some good advice here, and I haven't read all of it so I might be repeating something. If she does insist on paying you - perhaps she could give you a gift, e.g. a spa day or something, instead of cash? Or perhaps the money could be donated to a cancer charity or something? I'm thinking of you.
I'm with Citizen. Hold her to a future barter.
ReplyDeleteOr don't take a penny.